Overwhelm Part 2- VULNERABILITY
I sit at my desk in my home office slightly to the left of where the slow leak of the roof began. Chunks of plaster, plastic, one large bucket and several small buckets sit on a large drop cloth. The small brown mushroom shaped stain that emerged years ago remained unchanged until the late August/early September rain storms that issued unrelenting buckets of water from the sky. The brown stain quickly grew, spread and eventually three leaks emerged in the ceiling space where I work, teach, offer Reiki, and have my own personal yoga and meditation practice. The leaks eventually led to part of the ceiling rotting and disintegrating.
My husband, with his mad skills, wearing the invisible superhero cape he wears in the imagination of my heart and mind, sets ladders up and after a thorough investigation finds the need for new gutters, along with rotting wood and a whole porch roof that needs replaced.
Our situation, while not unique, serves to remind me that we, like many, are vulnerable. Yes, my husband has mad skills AND he is 71 years old. Yes, we are privileged to own our home with an almost paid off mortgage AND we can barely afford the upkeep even with John, my husband doing most of the work and both of us working.
WHEN EXISTING TAKES ALL THE ENERGY YOU HAVE
I see on local Facebook groups every day people asking for help with basic survival needs-food, diapers, furniture, etc.
I witness an acquaintance finding the need to create a Go Fund Me to assist with medical expenses and bills that have accumulated due to chronic illness and inability to earn a living wage.
So many of us struggle to exist. Health issues, finances, interpersonal conflicts challenge us and we watch in real time the impact of climate change in Nepal, the continued atrocities in Gaza, as well as in Sudan, Congo, Ukraine, and many other places on the planet.
EXISTING FEELS VULNERABLE
Yet, vulnerability can be a bridge to fear, and it also can be a bridge towards empathy and compassion and connection. The worldview that makes the most sense to me is a view that sees all of our wellness as bound up together.
Caring beyond ourselves is essential in moving beyond scarcity, even when we are challenged with a lack of resources. Very few of us are far removed from financial stress and health issues. It is telling that so many of the responses I see on social media, calling for food for the day or diapers, are met by folks with minimal resources themselves.
Vulnerability also can bridge fragility into fortitude. Even in the most desperate times I have faced, having someone reach out with a caring gesture, or response has facilitated my inner state from one of despair to the beginnings of hope.
As a species, we do well with this response during a crisis, people mobilize quickly when folks lose all their possessions in a fire, a flood or other disasters. However, more and more folks are needing greater supports for everyday life.
I have more resources than many people and I still struggle. I am reminded daily of the abundant blessings all around me and at the same time, my roof is leaking and I am overwhelmed.
My wish for you.
My wish for me.
My wish for all of us is ease.
May we honor the fragility and the fortitude that exists in each and every one of us.
May we be part of bridging fragility into fortitude where we are able to be of support.
May we expand our world views into reciprocity and mutual aid support for the thriving of all beings.
May we embody the love we wish to see in this world.
